Pleasurable Moments

As a rather odd way of recognizing my many blessings this Thanksgiving, I decided that I wanted to make a list of, what I consider to be, the most pleasurable moments available to a man like me. I thought about putting them in order, but scratched that idea for two reasons. First, I like to ramble, and going in order will stop my thinking processes. Secondly, some of my pleasurable moments may seem odd to you, so I don't want you to have the intimate knowledge of which ones are my favorites. I mean, come on! I'm going to tell you the things that give me the most pleasure. Isn't that intimate enough?

Now, those of you whose minds always travel to the dirty side can stop reading. Yes, there are erotic pleasures in my life just like anyone else's. They don't need to go on this list. If you are, were, or ever will be in a romantic relationship, you know about them without hearing more from me. If you don't know about them, you sure hit the jackpot! The very fact that you are sitting there reading my blog indicates that you are connected to the Internet. Heck, the number one money making industry on the Internet is the erotic pleasure business. Go to Google, if you need an education.

Before I go on, I want to rant a little about those people whose minds hear sexual innuendo in everything they hear. In my life, they are mostly female. I'm not commenting on the global population, only the people I interact with. The worst offender is a woman at my school. You can say almost anything, and her eyes will go wide, and her tongue will go on autopilot and make some off color or snotty remark. Once in the staff lounge, we were talking about Lucy the Elephant, which is an elephant-shaped building near where I lived in New Jersey as a child. I was always fascinated by her. You can see more about her by going to the website below:

http://www.lucytheelephant.org/

When I was very little, she was just a ruined shell. Then, they started a campaign to restore her to her Victorian glory. I even donated to the cause. When my grandmother died, I returned to New Jersey for her funeral. While there, I took the opportunity to go and see Lucy. It was thrilling for me. I actually got to walk up a spiral staircase in one of her legs and see the inside of the building.

Now back to the staff lounge. In our discussion of Lucy, I made the comment, "I love Lucy. I've even been inside her!" The others at my table said things like, "Really, what was it like?" and "Were there lots of rooms?" But that woman I mentioned took it to the gutter. Her eyes got really big, and she moaned lasciviously, "Jim! What would visitors think, if they heard you saying that?" I didn't even know what she was hinting at until one of the teachers at my table whispered something in my ear. I was really angry. I think she, as well as the rest of the staff at my school, should know that I would not say anything of the nature she twisted it to. I will add, that if a man had twisted my comment into a sexual reference, he would probably be fired for sexual harassment. This woman sits at my school and gets away with it all the time. In fact, most of the women around her usually laugh at her rude comments.

Okay, let's just move on. What was I writing about? Oh, yeah... pleasurable sensations. I was going to make a list. Now, remember, although these are numbered, they are not in order of pleasurability.

1) a close shave with a brand new blade That one is really hard to top. If you don't believe me, watch how men touch their faces all the time after a good shave. It really feels good to get all that stubble and grime off of our skin.

2) crossing the finish line of a 5K walk This is good for so many reasons. You've got the rush of endorphins, the feeling of accomplishment, the end to the effort it took to get there, and, if you are lucky, a nice cold drink of water. Funny, but the times I finished a marathon and half marathon, my only thoughts were, "Thank GOD that's over! GET ME HOME!" No pleasure then, at all.

3) a nice cold drink of water Had to list it. Believe it or not, water is my favorite drink. There is something about that first cold swallow that really gets to me. Especially when I have been too stupid to carry water with me on a long hike, and had to wait to get back to civilization for a drink.

4) sliding into a bed with crisp and freshly cleaned sheets That makes me want to go take a nap right now!

5) the sinus heat rush you get from wasabe If the wasabe was on a fantastically fresh slice of raw tuna, so much the better!

6) slipping into a hot baking soda bath after a long hard workout Stop laughing!!!!!! I had a long hard workout once in 1978. I still remember that bath.

7) eating a piece of pecan pie made with Mom's recipe with my eyes closed, pretending she is there with me Okay. I admit it. I was and will always be a mama's boy. Any small moment that gives Mom back to me is appreciated down to my very core. That did it... Now I'm crying like I did at The Blind Side.

8) those moments when time stands still during an event with your friends and you look at them enjoying themselves and feel so blessed to know them and be loved by them If you don't know what I mean, I honestly hope you get to feel it some day.

9) the sound of Joshua's voice when he wakes me up and says, "Dad, I'm home." Mom warned me that I would always worry about my kids. Just last night, I couldn't get to bed until Josh finally got home after 1:00 AM. I know that it's silly. I don't worry about him as much when he is away at school. But when he is home, I can't sleep well until he gets home.

10) that bittersweet moment when you finish a really wonderful book You know what I mean. You are so happy that you have heard the whole story. At the same time, you wish the story would never end.

11) seeing the look on someone's face when you've given them a gift that really touches them This is a rare pleasure for me. I consider myself a giving person. Finding the right gift, however, is not one of my gifts. ("not one of my gifts" Did you get that?)

12) the smell of a turkey roasting in the oven We are going to friend's for Thanksgiving dinner. We do every year. Just the same, I roast a small turkey here at home so we can smell it and nibble on it during the week. In fact, I better stop for a while and go get my pies and turkey cooked.

We should be thankful for our blessings all the time, not just during Thanksgiving. I'll come back to this from time to time to add more of my pleasurable moments. Trust me, there are many many more!